To the newcomers - the Reality of the Paranormal (what tv & media won’t tell you)

This is a sarcastic and satirical view of information we feel is important for those of you who want to be an investigator.

So you want to be a paranormal investigator? You've watched TAPS, Paranormal State, Most Haunted and two seasons of A Haunting. You Tivo'd MTV and VH1 and anything with the keyword "Ghost', even if it had Patrick Swayze and Whoopie Goldberg in it. You searched the internet for hours and mapquested any and all locations in your area code that you found on MYFAVORITEHAUNTEDSITES.com. (not a real site - at least I don't think so...)

You read the myths, looked at images and listened to evp's through crummy computer speakers. You knew that you were meant to be a ghost hunter (aka - paranormal investigator) from the first time you saw Casper on Nickelodeon. You felt it in your blood. You bought a voice recorder and printed out a list of the do's and don'ts of ghost hunting. You borrowed your mom's digital camera. Then you either went out on your own to investigate solo, joined a Meetup or other public ghost hunting group to investigate with other newcomers, or found a few school friends, office workers or bar buddies to go and ghost hunt with.

Then you contacted us or another group and asked how to be an investigator on our team or another one like it. I've heard it all. Most of you were very sincere in your requests. We acknowledge your sincerity. Some of you are now training with our team. Some of you we helped place for training with other teams.

Some others of you were dropping out of school because you knew you could make a living being a professional ghost hunter on TV. Heck, if Brian or John can do it, we can do it. Anyone can do it. You wanted our help. You emailed us over and over knowing this is why you were born, to be... *ba dum pum*(Cheesy sound effect) , a paranormal investigator.................

Here is our advice.
1
Brian and John were trained. You need to be trained. You need to find a group open to train you. This is hard to come by.

There is equipment training and spiritual protection training. There is training on how to record and document evp sessions, take photographs, analyze video and measure the elements in search of paranormal activity.

You need to be trained. By someone who knows what they are doing.

There is spiritual protection training - we'll touch this topic below. Be prepared to be trained. Start humbly and move up the ladder. This does not happen overnight. Even if you started your own group......you need to be trained.

2
Investigating is boring - you need patience

For the most part, paranormal investigating is boring. You sit for hours and hours waiting while nothing happens. You watch hours of footage and listen to hours of blank audio until your eyes go bad and your ears bleed. This is not fun. You loose circulation in your feet. This is work. Try waiting days for one good credible piece of evidence. Television compresses time. Some of your hour long shows were recorded over two or three days in order to get what you watched. Investigating is PATIENCE.....Sit in an empty warehouse for 6 hours in the middle of a winter night..... If you can't sit still - don't apply. If you cannot stay quiet for longer than a minute without asking a question, please do not apply. If you laugh at every noise or say "what was that?" with an English accent at every little bump you hear, we will call you Yvette and ask you to leave. You need to have self control. This comes over time. If you do have it, self control and patience, it will still get boring quickly.

3
Ghost Hunting and Paranormal investigating is an EXPENSIVE hobby!

The best way to go broke is to dedicate full time to investigating. Trust me on this one or talk to anyone who has been around for awhile. You will financially get affected. Your group will not become TAPS, get a TV show, most likely you will not become famous. You will end up financially struggling and wonder how it got so expensive. If your goal was to support yourself as a professional ghost hunter, get paid to investigate or be on TV, your in the wrong place and shouldn't pursue it until you get a college degree.

Additional note: Paranormal investigating can also take away your relationships and your jobs, even your kids in a nasty divorce because you were never home unless you were sleeping or listening to evp's........ it can take your sanity as well.

4
Investigating the paranormal can and will be dangerous to your health.

Eventually , you will have something follow you home if you decide to do this on a regular basis. Computers will fry and your equipment will malfunction. The majority of public Meetup teams we have worked with have had something follow them home from an investigation. This is not cool when it happens. You will not find this a fun opportunity to document paranormal activity in your bedroom while you pretend to sleep. Catching EVP's where you want to sleep will only cause you more problems. Prepare for this possibility by learning about spiritual protection even if you are atheist and don't believe it is possible. This applies to the purely scientific as well. Awareness of these dangers are growing. They are real. What makes you think that the spirit you just provoked and got that great "get out" evp doesn't have the right to follow you home and fry your laptop? Be aware that this possibility is real. These are our clients. Many were newcomers to investigating and never realized this danger was possible until it followed them home......

5
No drugs or alcohol on investigations

If you think getting drunk or high and investigating is cool, keep doing it. You can't drive under the influence so why do you think that scientifically investigating the paranormal should be any different? Heck, who need integrity of your data when your all slurring and freaking out over nothing. Key word, credibility. So many investigations that start up like this (burp), end up really bad three months later. I call these hitchhikers. They will attach to you because your too far gone to realize they have attached to you. You wake up feeling like your filled with lead, fuzzy headed and don't realize your sharing your body with a spirit because you think it is only a really bad hangover...
(that's funny....I've seen it happen)...

6
Treat the spirit world with respect.
If you don't know what your investigating or playing with, treat it with respect until you find out. There are human and inhuman, residual and intelligent. Elementals and other...... they know what is going on and we are still trying to document and prove what we can't understand yet. So let's give a little respect for the unknown.... maybe it will respect you back.

7
Treat your other fellow teams and investigators with respect

Too many teams are caught with infighting and outfighting. Let's not work together. Let's force loyalty to us only. Let's bash any other team who uses any other protocols than we we do. Let's find reasons to laugh, snicker, insult and mock the others. Let's spend so much time attacking each other that we stop investigating....... wow! what a concept.

In reality, let's take care of ourselves and our newest investigators. Let's work together with other teams, not lock away the potential to help those who need our help the most. There are two sides to this. Teams who investigate for fun at famous locations and teams who try to help give clients answers while scientifically documenting the paranormal. We do both big locations and private cases. We are open with working and helping any other teams out there. Let's be open to working with other teams, learn new methods, document in new different ways and help more people in more areas by volunteering our investigators to other teams who want or need to utilize them. And let's take care of our own members as well as other outside investigators.

If we keep attacking and turning on each other, we aren't doing what we wanted to do in the first place. We are too busy arguing and fighting to make any impact documenting the paranormal.

That would be like this if it was a sporting event.

Paranormal -1
Paranormal investigators - 0

So all the newcomers, treat everyone you meet in the community with respect. Even if they don't give it back. It creates a cancer in the community that needs to be controlled. So let's control ourselves to begin with.

I'll be posting another blog on signs of attachments or hitchhikers that you might find interesting. These are serious. I hope everyone got something out of the above sarcasm in a way they can appreciate. If your new coming into the paranormal, there is reality in what I've posted above. Don't let it turn you away. Investigating the paranormal can be fun, but TV does not portray the realities of being a paranormal investigator. So I will try......

Dan and Sandi
Southern California Paranormal Research Society
SOCALPRS.com